


My Anchor Mine Light

by caramelmage



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Comfort, F/M, Pining, post heavensward, this was more of a personal thing im so sorrt, we're shipping oc/npcs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27922897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caramelmage/pseuds/caramelmage
Summary: After the events of Baelsar's Wall, beloved Warrior of Light Sally Manders is crumbling under guilt and pain. Thank goodness Urianger is there to help her on one fated night at the Waking Sands.
Relationships: Urianger Augurelt/Warrior of Light
Kudos: 12





	My Anchor Mine Light

Evening time at Vesper Bay always seemed like it was bustling. It was as if a festival was on every night as people bustled through the streets. And yet these days at the Waking Sands did it seem ever quiet. 

Sally thumbed her way through the shelves as she always did, searching for books that would improve her. The topic of healing was a rusty one for her. She wished Y’shtola was there to guide her. But at the moment, it would be preferable if Sally just stayed out of everyone’s way. Increasingly, she was found to avoid people and kept to herself.

Part of her wished she didn’t have to see one Urianger. But would she be there if that was the case? Usually part of the reason she would do “research” was to see him. So perhaps she was here for a reason.

By a soft light, she sat. As of late, it was hard not to let thoughts consume her if she remained in silence. The guilt had its claws in her shoulders and her back, tearing down in an immeasurable pain. How many people had died because of her and not directly by her hand in the past few months? Too many. Too many… How was she the Warrior of Light if her light was dimming. Flickering as if she was at the end of her wick.

“My lady did not announce herself?” A voice rang out in the comfy room and a shadowy figure appeared in the doorway.

But the voice was all too familiar to Sally. She tensed up. Sweet Urianger…. 

“Thee… have not come here in awhile. I was beginning to miss thee.” Urianger smiled. Albeit weakly. 

“Ah! Urianger! I was wondering if you’d be here.” Sally tried her best to sound like she was beaming. It wasn’t that convincing. 

The elezen man took a spot across from Sally and motioned to her book ‘The Curious Case of Conjurers and White Mages: A Magical History of Healing In Eorzea’. 

“Thy book remains unopened. Thine face looks troubled, Lady Manders. A familiar pain in your eye. You let it bubble and simmer. ” His brow under his goggles softened. As of late… he understood the pains of many people. But the focus was Sally. Who looked so tired that even her soul probably needed a nap.. 

Sally’s throat closed up as she tried to speak. Her chest crackled under the pressure. Her brown eyes glistened underneath lamp light. She had no desire to cry in front of the man and banish all good images he had of the Warrior of Light. She silently opened the book. Today would not be the day she cried. Not in front of someone she so admired. 

“... Mine lady. It was not thy fault. Master Papalymo made a choice. And the choice at his hands did save all of Eorzea from a calamity once more. Do not blame thy valiant self for this. I know, my lady, I know. To lose a friend is a pain that burns slow and deep.”

Sally felt the prickle in her eyes. The pain had become fiercer. Her lip trembled. But the tears would not fall as she took a deep breath. _Does he blame me for her death? His death? What am I doing to The Scions. I’m the problem. I’ve probably always been._

Sally’s hands fell into her lap. Her fingers twisted the fabric of her skirt. “That’s easy for you to say, my dearest Urianger.” Her breath shuddered. A nervous laugh escaped her. She was bitter. Angry. Scared. Cornered like an animal. Perhaps she needed to alienate herself. For life. 

“I’ve lost so many people. Who had followed me with their spirits high. I lead them. Like a mother duck leading her loved ones to doom and death. What if I cannot protect Aymeric? “ Sally’s little tears couldn’t take it. They burst at the seam of her eyes. They trickled down in shame and anger. Down into her lap they fell. So much had been stored in her heart and mind.

The names that echoed in her mind Moenbryda. _Haurchefant. Ysayle. Haurchfant. Ysayle. Minfilia. Haurchefant. Haurchefant. Papalymo. Papalymo_. 

_Papalymo…._

“W-What if I cannot protect Alphinaud. Or Alisae? They’re so dear to me. So very dear!” Sally winced at the words as the idea sprang to her mind. She felt so much love in her heart for the twins. As if they were her own siblings. No. They _were_ her family. 

But her deep blue scaled hand was taken by Urianger’s own. He squeezed firmly. It grounded her despite the tightness in her chest. She took a deep breath. Then frowned hard as if her brow was about to crack. Too much was going on in that head of hers.

“And you!” She jabbed a finger in Urianger’s direction sounding thoroughly annoyed. He looked startled only for a moment.

“Fiddling about with the Ascians and the Warriors of Darkness. Not telling anyone! Or me! As soon as you locked eyes with me I _knew_ it was you! Your voice plays in my mind often! Your speech patterns too! I thought I had lost you too in a way! I thought I might never see you again! What were you thinking?! What if they found you out and hurt you? The Ascians especially. Even if in the end the Warriors Of Darkness were... fine. And why on earth is everyone keeping so many secrets from me?!” Sally was breathless after all this. She swallows hard. _Too much?_

Urianger said nothing yet. He had all the time in the world for Sally. She needed this. He knew that.

Sally looked at their hands and then away, shutting her eyes tight. Her tail tensed up. Her whole body practically did. “I can’t keep doing this. I lose people. And now I’m not sure if I’m trusted. What sort of hero is that? What is the point of _me_?”

Urianger looked at her. Her eyes looked lifeless as they opened up to peek at him. Her pain ran deep. And her manner was very unlike her. He’d never seen her so sad. She didn’t deserve to have all this weight on her consciousness. 

Urianger returned his hands for a moment and took off his goggles. He lowered his hood. He trusted Sally. It was only fair he looked at her as she once saw him. No more secrets. Not for now. 

“Firstly, Miss Manders, if I was found out, then it wouldn’t have been because of any of your faults. Nor the Scions. Mine own actions would cause mine own outcome.” Urianger’s tone was serious yet truthful. His mouth was the shape it usually was. Almost like you could never tell what he was about to say.

“Second of all, Thou expect too much of thyself, Lady Manders. Sally, I trust thee. As does every one of Scions. I assure thee. Thou are one of our great foundations now.” He smiled softly, fixing a piece of hair off of her face which had previously dangled in front of her nose. 

Sally allowed him. Sometimes she didn’t mind being taken care of like this. Especially by him. She giggled.

Urianger chuckled softly in return. Then frowned for a moment. “Thou... hath not spoken to me since, have you? I am most glad you are speaking to me now. Because I care for thee, Sally. I hope thou know this.”

Urianger took his hands back and folded them together. “I can understand having no desire to ever speak to me again after what I carried out.”

He paused, considering his words carefully. Ever the educated elezen. “T’was a risk! I know it was dangerous. To serve as a liaison and a spy simultaneously is as idiotic as it gets. I knew if I revealed mine intentions.... I would be stopped. It was the only way to make sure…. Everything worked exactly how it should. And I will continue to do my work safely. My status should not be a weight on your strong shoulders.”

Urianger hesitated. He thought of Minfilia. His eyes closed as he winced. He knew Sally’s pain. He had lost so many as of late. When you stopped to think about it, the pain never really stopped.

His voice grew hoarser with welling emotion. It was hard not to do so in front of someone you cared for. “It’s not that I don’t trust thee. Not at all. And I am alive, Sally. As are you. And I am most glad I can see the sun shine upon thy face once more. As well as hearing you often think about my voice with bated breath.”

Sally laughed incredibly genuinely. She was much calmer than she had been. His sweet words centred her. She considered all of what he had to say (which was a lot). Of course she wasn’t the only one in pain. Of course he had reasons for sneaking around. And she supposed it made sense. She hadn’t understood any of her friends intentions in the past few weeks. But she was getting there.

The Au Ra closed her eyes for a moment. “Forgive me. For my…eruption. You’ve been through enough matters as of late. I’m sorry. Finding out about Lyse too recently felt like I was being left out of the loop. And I’m afraid I felt the same way with you.” Sally meekly admitted. “I care about you too, Urianger. And I am reminded why every time I see you.”

Urianger smiled at that, but then presented her with the most sincere expression she’d ever seen in awhile. 

“And I must apologise to thee for not sharing my intentions. As the Warrior of Light I had ought to have told you. Alas. It came to light this way. But truly do apologise. We Scions may be close to one another, but sometimes we have these secrets to keep ourselves and others safe.” 

Sally nodded. Yes. She did understand where he was coming from. “Thank you, Urianger. Your work cannot be easy for you. I would detest having your job.” 

Urianger’s thumb gently stroked Sally’s hand in an attempt to seem tender. “Tis not the worst thing in the world if I got to cross paths with you, mine lady. And… Do remember there is no set way to be a hero, Sally. You are allowed weakness. I promise. Do not resist to weep. Weep upon me, If you should like. Anytime.”

Sally smiled ever so sweetly. Her little crush was _devastating_ for him. Only she could have a very deep and personal conversation and then feel lovesick. Ridiculous. 

“Was that an order, Master Urianger?” She chuckled, but her chest remained tight. How can one flirt in such a state of emotional anguish?

Urianger darkened in a few shades, something blooming in his cheeks. “N-No order, mine lady. Just reassurance. An offer of assistance.”

Sally studied his face for a minute. She dare not to ogle. Yet she completely was. Those golden eyes and scruffy cheeks really _really_ drove her thought into the ground.

“You really are something of a beauty, Urianger.” she murmured, however immediately blushing. _Damn. Why didn’t I censor myself?! I completely am not reading the room,_ she cursed internally.

Urianger’s eyes widened. “Ah. Well. Yes…. Thank you, Miss Manders. Your…” He just _had_ to clear his throat. “Ahem. Thy beauty doth surpass mine own.” 

Ah. “Well I’m certainly not going to argue over who is more beautiful. That is very kind of you to say, dearest Urianger.” Sally couldn’t really match that poetically. She giggled and then finally opened her book. 

The two remained in silence, still holding hands. It’s as if Sally would lose him if she let go. Every so often in the hour she’d look over at where they had joined. It looked right. And it felt absolutely right. If not a bit sweaty. If she thought about it too much, she may pass out.

But as the hours went by, Sally felt her eyes getting more tired and worn. She felt as if she could sleep for decades. She stood up, letting go of Urianger’s hand. 

Urianger, whilst sitting, did not stand much taller than Sally now. The perfect height for eye contact.

He looked at her with a polite little smile. “Is this good night? Sleep has thee in its loving embrace?”

For a moment he looked a little disappointed. That was until the hands returned to cup his face. Sally held him so gently, her eyes never leaving his. He felt warm. Her keen eyes noticed how his lips parted automatically.

“Will you tell me if I’m about to make a bad decision? If it’s too much emotionally. Or Physically.” Sally spoke earnestly. “Will you tell me if I am inappropriate?” 

Urianger nodded. But they both knew what was coming. And he was entirely sure he wanted it. Not a care in the world for mood.

Sally leaned in, her heart and soul (of what she had left) going into the kiss. A kiss she was absolutely dying to do. It was a chance she had to take. Had she spent two hours on reading? Hardly! It was mostly full of thoughts for planning. She needed to take that leap. 

Her sigh of relief put the hair Urianger’s neck on edge. Her breath hot upon his mouth. It was desperate. It was exhilarating. And not at all badly timed, in his opinion. The soft feeling of her lips would never be forgotten. They had imprinted on him like ink to paper. 

Until Sally had to part. Just to make sure this was all real. 

“How was that for ‘good night’ ?” Sally smiled graciously, though her words betrayed this. Her eyes looked worn yet they sparkled with mischief. _Still got some of it left. Not bad, Sally. Not bad._ She noted to herself.

Urianger bloomed red, scruffy cheeks turning dark. It took him a few moments to collect himself. For someone who eased into the kiss so readily, he sure was stiff following the events. “I… Mayhap I need to analyze that once more? Now... Or on another day?”

“Cheeky. A quick experiment, then.” Sally tutted. Well he had asked for it. Sally delivered a sound peck on his lips. Her eyes fluttered into it. She could never go back now. And the urge to crawl onto him has to be resisted strongly. But she stood up straight and grinned, taking a step back.

“Thank you for listening to me, sweet Urianger. Not only are you a good friend but… I adore you. I truly adore you.” She gestured to the door. “I’m off to find a chair to lie in. Good night, sweetness.”

Urianger has his fingers to his lips as if he had been graced by an angel. “And good night to thee, Sally. May you walk in the land of dreams without a worry in the world.”

Sally slinked away and left the room, unsure if it really was because she was tired. But the two of them were left blushing. And with _many_ thoughts. Most of which were incoherent and messy.

But they both had one thing on their minds after that.

_Ah… I want to do that again._


End file.
